There is a person in my office talking like this dragon from Dragon Heart today. He won’t stop, and he is pretty good at it. Never hire fan boys.
(Irish accent)
Why do tese trousers cost $2 dollars & tirty nine cents?
Because if tey were a cent more, tey’d be, too farty!
Thank you! Thank you!
Dear Bumps,
this one is lofty, but i have decided that i am too lazy to make my
own decisions in life.
therefore, where should i go to school? CSU Fullerton or should I
follow my dreams and go to UC Santa Cruz and learn how to use a bong?
Or, should I sell everything I own and go live in my truck until I
find myself in one place long enough to go back to school?
I feel like I need to succeed at something in life because currently
my short term goals involve buying world of warcraft and becoming
morbidly obese.
Finally,
Do i look hot when i’m wet?
Sincerely,
too young to die, too old to care
Dear Too young to die, too old to Care:
These questions are hitting close to home today. Alright, here goes:
Go to Fullerton, don’t move your life until you have at least some idea of how you want it to end up. Ive been to Santa Cruz, you don’t want it to end up there.
Do not sell everything you own and live in a truck. You are too old and don’t need to be the scarry guy who lives in his truck. Look, Carole told me this once, and I have found that when pondering the meaning of life, this is the only thing that makes a lick of sense “we were put on earth, to fart around”. Yes. Its true. So, you accomplish something, right? Then in a month, 6 months, 18 months you start to feel worthless again and need to accomplish something else. It is an endless cycle of butt hole.
Serriously, sit on your couch for a whole afternoon by yourself not doing anything but figuring out what you want to accomplish. It can be small. Not everyone is supposed to do big things. Askabumps@gmail.com has never accomplished anything and I am perfectly fine with that. We can’t all be the guy who made salvation mountain. Figure out what you want and work on it but figure out something you might want to do after that to avoid the empty pit-of- your-stomach dissapointment after you have accomplished your thingy.
In the short term, buy world of warcraft, order some chicken fried steak and STAY OUT OF THE WATER.
send your questions to askabumps@gmail.com
Dead ask a bumps,
When your friends are more important to you then your family, how long
to do you keep contact with your family? When is it safe to tell your
family to beat it?
Ready to let go.
Dear Ready to Let Go:
Is this in regards to the upcomming gluttony day? Askabumps@gmail.com does not believe in biological family. Just becuase you share DNA does not mean you need to associate outside the womb. Fuck that. In 2007, you choose your family and must use EXTREME discretion when letting a new member in. Gently put your biological family outside and hope they never come back in…and never look back even if you need a kidney.
send your questions to askabumps@gmail.com
Ben Curtis used to be the tool who slung Dell computers a few years back.
Then he got caught smoking pot, and was let go of the Dell, “Dude you’re getting a Dell” campaign.
Sucks for him cause he could have been the new corp. ad tool, “Can you hear me now” guy. Just think about how much money that, “Can you hear me now” guy must have. It is mind boggling.
Anyway, Poor Ben now works in NY at a tortilla flats.
Read about it here. Its sad. Don’t do drugs and get caught, and have a national commerical on TV. Because you will be the butt of drunk peoples jokes for years to come.
Dj Steve Aoki is in the new 2k video game NBA 2K8. Available for Playstation 3 and Nintendo 360.
Oh wait, this is not satisfying your Aoki fix? Now you can dress like like him too thanks to the Aoki signature line from Kr3W.
Here is a new music video that is sweeping the “net”. Straight out of Miami, “Casual Sax” is picking up right where 2Live Crew left off. This duo consists of Mr. Sven Barth and Induce ripping the mics. Keep you eye on this up and coming group, this might just be your kids favorite band.
Why isn’t m0nstereye online?
