Ask A Bumps - “My Vaj-a-jay’s painin!”

Posted by bumps in Ask A Bumps, whateves on July 8th, 2008 @ 8:59 am

So, If you know me, you know my va-jay-jay has troubs. The following is an account of what sometimes happens when your va-jay-jay is as oprah says, “painin”.

[10:45] bumpsasarusrex: dude
[10:45] bumpsasarusrex: i have a story for you
[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: that has nothing to do with dudes btw
[10:46] m0nstereye: let it rip
[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: alright so yesterday I go to the vag-a-jay doctor to
[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: find out whats up with my jay-jay
[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: cuz its in troubs
[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: so
[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: the following things happen while im there:

[10:46] bumpsasarusrex: #1 my new gyno hates the gays which made me extremely uncomfortable
[10:47] bumpsasarusrex: since this shouldn’t be the first topic of conversation
[10:47] bumpsasarusrex: when someone is staring into your gine
[10:47] bumpsasarusrex: #2 I kept my boots on becuase im lazy and the nurse and the doctor (again while kickin it in my gine) sang the apple bottom jeans boot with the fur song
[10:48] bumpsasarusrex: except the gyno was saying bell bottom jeans and then the nurse would make fun of him
[10:48] bumpsasarusrex: THEN
[10:48] bumpsasarusrex: I go for blood work and im in the blood chair
[10:49] bumpsasarusrex: and I look up and see this like computer printout of a rediculously long internet joke about asking god to send you a good mexican man
[10:49] bumpsasarusrex: so the lady takes like all of my blood
[10:49] m0nstereye: this is wonderful
[10:49] m0nstereye: you need to whateves this
[10:49] bumpsasarusrex: and i held my breath becuase
[10:49] bumpsasarusrex: i will
[10:50] bumpsasarusrex: I wasn’t even thinking about it and she took 4 blood thingies
[10:50] bumpsasarusrex: and i passed out after giving her like 10 warning i was going to
[10:50] bumpsasarusrex: and then she got mad and made me lay on the floor and gave me “cold juice”
[10:50] m0nstereye: cold juice
[10:50] m0nstereye: hahaa
[10:50] bumpsasarusrex: which was a capri sun (im sorry that does not qualify as cold juice)
[10:50] m0nstereye: hahaha
[10:50] bumpsasarusrex: and then i looked up
[10:51] bumpsasarusrex: at like where my blood vials were kicking it
[10:51] bumpsasarusrex: and there was a half eaten burrito like laying right next to my blood
[10:51] bumpsasarusrex: then becuase my stupid arm would not stop bleeding
[10:51] m0nstereye: stay out the free clinic
[10:51] bumpsasarusrex: they wrapped
[10:51] bumpsasarusrex: no this was a nice rich orange county house wife [place
[10:51] bumpsasarusrex: i was shocked
[10:52] bumpsasarusrex: anyway
[10:52] bumpsasarusrex: they wrapped my arm up in this crazy thing that had advertising for gardasil all over it
[10:52] bumpsasarusrex: so then I couldn’t even go anywhere after becuase
[10:52] m0nstereye: ahahhah
[10:52] bumpsasarusrex: my arm was advertising the hpv vaccine
[10:52] m0nstereye: this is the best outting ever
[10:52] bumpsasarusrex: yeah it kind of ruled

Related posts:

  1. Ask A Bumps - Success Dear Bumps, where do i get a successful man?...
  2. Ask A Bumps - Family Dead ask a bumps, When your friends are more...
  3. Ask A Bumps - Migration Dear Bumps, So early last year most of my...
  4. Ask A Bumps - Dream Analysis Dear Ask A Bumps: Analyze This… So you know when...
  5. Ask A Bumps - Ass Pee Ask A Bumps, I’ve had ass pee for 2...

5 Responses to ' Ask A Bumps - “My Vaj-a-jay’s painin!” '

Subscribe to comments with RSS or TrackBack to ' Ask A Bumps - “My Vaj-a-jay’s painin!” '.

  1. tarasaidthat said,
    on July 8th, 2008 at 9:14 am

    holy crap…i don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

  2. kelly bumps said,
    on July 8th, 2008 at 9:47 am

    You should laugh. I did. And kept asking the doctor and nurse to stop making it awkward. I didn’t even include the part where something happened I wasn’t expecting and i jumped up and the paper crap i was wearing fell off and I was butt ass naked. I laughed until i cried

  3. kelly bumps said,
    on July 8th, 2008 at 1:31 pm

    I would also like to state that the above story has nothing to do with stds…im just sayin

  4. Anonymous said,
    on July 10th, 2008 at 3:09 pm

    did you spend anytime defending the gays? or did you sit silent like the catholic church did during the holocaust.

  5. shananagans said,
    on November 23rd, 2008 at 10:46 am

    Bumps you make me pee my pants little. and my Vajay is angry at life also!

Leave a reply

registration | Register | Log in

:mrgreen: :neutral: :twisted: :shock: :smile: :???: :cool: :evil: :grin: :oops: :razz: :roll: :wink: :cry: :eek: :lol: :mad: :sad: