DEAR ASK A BUMPS:

I work in a very weird office environment the professionals I work with are older, in their 60’s. The support staff is young, dumb and full of cum.
I lie right in the middle of these worlds, not old enough for Viagra and not young enough to do keg stands. On one side I get to hear about miscarriages in toilets after one night stands and on the other I get to hear about hip replacement surgery. While I like to stay locked in my own office left to my thoughts and farts, I feel like I segregate myself too much at work. I don’t want to talk about ointment, and I don’t want to talk about jauger bombs and redbull either. What do I do?

Signed,
Why can’t people where suits to work anymore.

Dear Why can’t people wear suits to work anymore:

You are asking the wrong Bumps. This Bumps encourages as much anti social behavior as possible and my reasoning lies in your signature. In 2008, People have no class. Lock your door. Create an escape hatch that goes from your office directly to your car. Stay away from those troglodytes. Do not pass go. Do not stop for salt cheese. It sucks being socially separated from your coworkers, but look, you aren’t 60 and you aren’t in a fraternity. I’m guessing they all wear jeans and t shirts to work. You do not need one more friend who wears denim trousers. You need people who make you look good. That said, miscarriages in toilets is always good water cooler talk.

Sincerely

AskABumps

Saw this at lunch. So great!

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I know old icons need a paycheck, I loved me some Mr. T. He’s always had such a good attitude, I even got excited for his reality show where he helped people. I’ve actually written about him many many times on whateves. I even own his records on vinyl.
But no more, I’m done. His new commercial where he is shooting snickers at a speed walker from a monster truck is just too much. ‘Cause clearly he isn’t shooting a “speed walker”, he needs his candy eating friends to be “MEN”, Real Men, MEN who beat their wives and slup pussy like a big gulp. He should be shooting his snickers are dead beat dads, or that dude from the Hills with the creepy flesh colored beard. Not super gay speed walkers.

Here’s the commercial if you haven’t seen it yet.

Link

update
the ad was pulled for being homophobic link